Cap'n Crunch

Cap'n Crunch is a major member of the Barney Bunch. He is also known as the gay homosexual butt pirate. He got to join, because he was known for giving Ronald McDonald a blow-job. Even though he gave Ronald McDonald a blow-job, his best butt buddy is The Quaker Queer, because they work at the same company. The chocolate flavor is made out of his shit, the regular is made by adding more piss to the cereal, and the berries oops. The berries are just solid spheres of cum that are painted red and blue by Bi-Char's anal blood and Bi-Blast's "water-like milk", respectively (The "berries" were originally testicles, but The M-san Bunch forced him to reduce the amount of castration and/or male genital mutilation by using a non-misandric alternative, be boycotted by all MsB branches, and/or be hung and cremated. Because of this 'infamous controversy', he is solemnly forbidden from becoming a member/ally of the Nonsexist Bunch.). He recommends that you eat his cereal with cum instead of milk.