Lou Pickles

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Lou Pickles
Grandpa Lou Pickles.png
Personal Information
Birthday: February 1, 1925 (age 91)
Zodiac: Aquarius
Occupation: Gay porn actor/director, military general (former), rapist
Residence: Drewland
Nationality: American (birth), Drewish
Heritage: English, Canadian, Polish
Orientation: Homosexual
Groups: The Barney Bunch
Relationships: Drew Pickles (son)
Origin: Rugrats
Penis Size: 15 miles long (originally 150 miles)
Louis Kalhern "Lou" Pickles II (born February 1, 1925) is the father of Drew Pickles and Stu Pickles and a member of The Barney Bunch. He's extremely obsessed with the number 15 because his cock is fifteen miles long.


Lou Pickles was born on February 1, 1925 in Uniontown, Ohio. At the age of 16, Lou joined the United States Navy, shortly after the U.S. joined World War II. Lou was commonly known as "shit eater" because when he was in the Navy all of his fellow sailors would take huge shits in his mouth, as "loo" is another word for toilet. However, Lou was severely injured in 1945, and at a hospital, he met a nurse named Sue. Sue was in love with Lou but knew Lou hated women, so she brainwashed Lou into being heterosexual while he was in the hospital. After the war, the two lived happily together, and they ended up getting married in 1947. However, on a vacation in February 1949, they conceived the gaylord named Drew Pickles. After Stu Pickles was born, Sue Pickles died and Lou was finally freed from Sue's mind control.

Lou's Adventures in Japan and Outer Space

In late 1950 Lou Pickles was drafted back into the Navy to oversee the Allied occupation of Japan, and was simultaneously appointed to a gay five-star general. He would spend many nights at the Hotel New Grand in Yokohama, Kanagawa having a swell time with Douglas MacArthur, but his influence was not limited to just the military. Lou was assigned to govern the Kanagawa Prefecture, and enforced homosexual only marriage laws and discouraged heterosexual relationships. These laws greatly upset a local couple in Yugawara who believed in straight sex, and as a result they raised their oldest daughter to carry on their heterosexual ways as a protest.

Lou in 1957. He sure looked swell back then!

The occupation ceased in 1952, but Lou was captivated by the Japanese culture and decided to stay around for a while. It was a swell thing that he did, because one night Lou was in his barracks jacking off to gay pornos of Popeye, Bluto and Wimpy having orgies, when some magazines of gay shotacon popped up in his mail. Lou then discovered the identity of one of the young males, and had the child prodigy make yaois for the Barney Bunch's youth wing, while helping to bridge LGBT communities across Asia, the West Coast and the Pacific.


Lou Pickles has starred in many classic gay porn films over the years, and debuted on YouTube with his tape recording "Lou Pickles Jacks Off". Even to this day he continues to help The Barney Bunch make sex tapes and pornos. In an interview in 2012, Drew Pickles said "Lou sure is a bag of a father. From our Saturday Night Poopy Parties to my annual birthday orgy, he made my childhood swell."


Lou Pickles is lazy and slow, spending a lot of time sleeping on the chair. He enjoys throwing "poopy parties" and watching his son have sex with men. He has a fascination with collecting things. He mainly collects condoms and gay porn tapes. He engages in a turbo orgy once every month.