300 Miles

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300 Miles is an upcoming biographical film about the life of Drew Pickles. It will be directed by acclaimed gay porn director The Ground Control Guy and will star Drew Pickles, Stu Pickles, Lou Pickles, Barney, Ronald McDonald, Dick the Clown and Ned Flanders.

The screenplay was adapted by Drew and Lou Pickles from their own autobiographies; the former's Gay, Gay Man: Life as the Gayest Man in the Universe (1991) and Why I Married Her and Other Tales of Misogyny (2004), and the latter's Life as a Homosexual Acrobat: The Lou Pickles Faze (1999).

Principal photography began in July 2015 and filming began in April 2016, and was originally slated to be released on November 16, 2019, but was moved to November 18, 2017.

Plot

The plot of 300 Miles will center around the various life stories of Drew Pickles, such as (but not limited to) how he first met Barney, his battle against Swellnomore, the alien god of homophobia, his arrest at age 13 after raping his 7th grade classmate Derrik Michaels, the production of his very first porno, Drew Pickles Fucks Chaz Finster (1967), the founding of Drewland, his attempted rape of Fidel Castro, his marriage to Charlotte Pickles, the birth of his daughter, Angelica, his daughter getting taken away by CPS due to his and Charlotte's reckless parenting, him and Charlotte's rape of the CPS employees, his arrest after raping Gerald McBoingBoing and iChancerocks95, his trips to Panem and North Korea, his rape of Prince George, his involvement in the death of Fred Phelps and his marriage to Barney after the legalization of gay marriage in the United States.

Cast

  • Drew Pickles as Himself and Lou Pickles (young)
  • Barney as Himself
  • Stu Pickles as Himself
  • Lou Pickles as Himself
  • Ronald McDonald as Himself
  • Dick the Clown as Himself
  • Ned Flanders as Himself
  • Charlotte Pickles as Herself
  • Angelica Pickles as Herself (teen and adult)
  • Collin Dean as Drew Pickles (child)
  • Pierce Gagnon as Stu Pickles (child)
  • Jillian Ward as Angelica Pickles (toddler and child)
  • Drake Bell as Drew Pickles (teen)
  • Macaulay Culkin as Stu Pickles (teen)
  • Nadia Azzi as Flying Penis (voice) and Sue Pickles (teen)
  • Tiffany Darwish as Sue Pickles
  • Dick Dale as Drew's grandfather
  • Lydia Canaan as Drew's grandmother
  • Randy Carmichael as Himself
  • Chaz Finster as Himself

Filming

Portions of the film were shot in California, with some filming done in North Carolina.

American surf rock guitarist Dick Dale played the role of Drew's grandfather, while other actors played the roles of the rest of the cast.