Ronald McDonald

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Ronald McDonald
Personal Information
Birthday: September 6, 1950 (age 64)
Zodiac: Virgo
Occupation: Clown, CEO of McDonald's, chef, children's entertainer, gay porn actor, rapist, pedophile
Residence: Drewland
Nationality: American (birth), Drewish
Heritage: Irish, Polish
Orientation: Homosexual
Groups: The Barney Bunch
Origin: McDonald's
Penis Size: 250 miles long

Ronald Tadeusz McDonald, better known as the "Penis Clown", is one of the major members of the Barney Bunch. Being one of the three cooks of Drew Pickles, he creates very VERY swell recipes for his food. He especially feeds it to his boyfriend Grimace and also his sex slave the Hamburglar. He and Grimace have been boyfriends since 1966. Apparently, he forced "Birdie" to the Fergo Bunch. His cock is 250 miles long. He likes to yell "RAN RAN RUUUUUUU!!!!"


Ronald was born on September 6, 1950. His mother was originally from Poland and became a US citizen in 1954; his dad was an Irish-American circus performer. However, because Roger McDonald died shortly after Dick the Clown was born, Ronald's mother put both Ronald and Dick in a foster home. He grew up with his brother Dick the Clown, homeless, sad, and had a rough early life being raised and adopted by John Wayne Gacy. He started to make pornos in 1963. Until he went to a bar and met Drew Pickles in the mid-1980s. His littlest brother Gymbo, went into hiding. Then a miracle happened in 1994: Drew, Barney, and Ronald finally got Dick to join them and form the Barney Bunch, which wasn't until 11 years later. (Fun fact: Another swell nickname is Ronald Penis McClown.) A few years ago, he started to lactate. He is one of the few "milkmaids" among the Barney Bunch, with the others being King Dedede, Zhang Fei, Hugo, Bob Tidalson's clone, and Classic RobotnikClaus.



  • Ronald McDonald sued the homophobes behind "Ronald McDonald Playground Slaughter" and used the money for 69,000 dildis after he won the legal battle.
  • Ronald McDonald, like Drew Pickles and Barney the Dinosaur, is one of the very first Barney Bunch members.
  • Ronald raped the three Guangzhou urban management officers who dismantled one of his statues to death, and sold their bodies for meat.